TOUCH ME Page 27

  The silence in the room pressed in on her, and she turned to Drake, seeking some of his strength for the final confrontation.

  He brushed her cheek with gentle fingers, his eyes full of warm emotion. "The truth frees us, Thea, no matter how difficult to utter."

  She nodded and turned back to her family. "When Mama learned of Langley's final perfidy, she was devastated. I think Lady Upworth kept it from her as long as she could, but Uncle Ashby planned a trip to London. Mama intended to accompany him. She wanted to see Jared. Lady Upworth realized the trip would be a disaster and wrote Mama with the truth."

  Jared's face lost all color, and the pink flesh of his scar stood out against the pale skin of his cheek.

  He turned to Langley, accusation blazing in his eyes. "You married Jacqueline while my mother was still living."

  When Langley did not respond, Jared turned back to Thea. She desperately wanted to comfort him. The betrayal and pain she saw in his eyes broke her heart.

  "Mama canceled her trip to England, horrified at the scandal you would be forced to endure if the truth became known. It wasn't until later that she hit upon the idea of using Langley's behavior as a source of blackmail."

  "She was going to blackmail him?" Jared asked.

  "She was going to force him to let her see you."

  "But she never came. I never met her."

  Thea bit her lip and shook her head. "No. You never saw her. She contracted the fever two weeks before our ship was to sail. Although she recovered somewhat, she never again had enough strength to make the voyage. Eventually a second bout of the fever killed her."

  Now that the entire truth had been told, exhaustion overwhelmed Thea. She wanted to go home with Drake and let him hold her until she fell asleep, safe in his arms. She also wanted to reach out and comfort her brother, but she did not have the right. They were practically strangers.

  Langley stared at Jared, who looked at him as if he had turned into the devil himself.

  Langley erupted into speech. "You must understand. I convinced myself that your mother truly was dead or she would have come back to me, to you. Then there was Jacqueline. She carried Irisa and I could not let my child go through life with the stigma of illegitimacy."

  Jacqueline burst into noisy tears and ran from the room.

  Irisa crossed her arms and tapped her foot against the carpeted floor. "Knowing Mama, she seduced you and trapped you into marriage when she got pregnant. Being a squire's daughter, she probably figured marriage to an earl was worth the risk." She sighed. "Poor Mama." Then Irisa's face cleared and a smile like the noonday sun came out. "This means I am a bastard."

  Drake stiffened next to Thea.

  "Irisa," Lady Upworth admonished, "you will not use such language."

  Irisa apologized prettily and then turned to Thea. "I cannot thank you enough. His Grace will never marry the by-blow of an earl. I'm free." She laughed with delight. "I'm truly free."

  Lady Upworth smiled. "There is that, my dear, there is that. Your mother won't be quite as relieved as you, I fear."

  "Serves her right. Knowing Papa, he probably told her about Thea's mother and she still chose to marry him."

  Jared asked, "Did you tell her?"

  Langley looked up and said, "Yes. She was willing to risk it. She, too, believed Anna must be dead." He faced Irisa. "She wanted you to carry my name."

  "I'll bet."

  Thea smiled at Irisa's forthright approach to life. She suspected the affection that had started on mere acquaintance would grow deep between the two of them.

  "Do not be too hard on your mother. She has only done what she thought was best for you."

  Irisa nodded, her expression turned serious. "She can't help caring so much about the polite world and their opinions. I don't suppose you would be willing to continue to keep your secret from Society?"

  Drake spoke for the first time since the conversation had begun. "Thea is very good at keeping secrets. She wants to know you, not hurt you."

  "My husband is right. There is no reason to tell the rest of the ton the truth."

  "What about the fact that you are my daughter? Do you wish to reveal the connection?"

  Thea met her father's gaze. "I want to claim my family. Aunt Harriet and Irisa are already in my heart too deeply for me to deny them."

  "I prefer not to tell Society that Irisa's mother and I weren't truly married when she was born, for her sake, but I want to claim my daughter. I owe it to Anna. I owe it to you."

  "It will be difficult to keep the one secret while revealing the other," Jared said expressionlessly, his voice and manner showing that the night's revelations had opened a chasm between him and their father.

  "Every family has secrets. We can keep ours," replied Lady Upworth.

  "Well, Thea, what do you say?" Langley asked.

  "I want to be part of my family and see no reason to share a secret that is really more my sister's than my own."

  Irisa threw her arms around Thea and hugged her tight. "I've always wanted a sister."

  Thea allowed her father to embrace her, though she could not force herself to return the affectionate gesture. Perhaps in time. As her aunt had said, he would have to prove himself worthy of her love.

  He stepped away. "Welcome home, daughter."

  Jared reached out and touched her. His eyes still bore the marks of shock, but they held wonder as well. He kissed her cheek and then stepped away.

  Thea went forward and hugged Lady Upworth. "I love you."

  The dowager dabbed at her eyes. "I love you, too, niece. I always have."

  Irisa caught all their attention when she moaned, "Does this mean I still have to marry His Grace?"

  Emotion, so strong it threatened to overwhelm him, coursed through Drake.

  Thea stood at her window, looking out into the fog-shrouded London night. She wore no wrapper over her nightrail, and the soft contours of her body pressed against the sheer fabric.

  She turned her head when he entered the room, a soft smile of welcome curving her mouth. "Why is it that we have separate rooms? I suppose it is some unfathomable custom among the ton. It seems silly, though, to have a bed we never use. Don't you think?"

  Ever since he and Thea had left Langley's town house, Drake had been struggling with a way to express how proud he felt of his wife. Her musing about the eccentricities of the ton sidetracked him.

  He walked over to where she stood near the window and drew her against him. "Not all husbands and wives sleep together."

  Her eyes filled with amusement. "Come, you cannot convince me of that faraddidle. If that were true, successions would soon die out."

  He laughed and a sense of peace stole over him. He would never regret marriage to this enchanting woman. A name attached itself to the feelings that had bedeviled him since he met her. Love. He was top over tails in love with his wife.

  Laughter welled up and spilled over again. He could not wait to share the words with her. Surely she would then express her own love for him. He was certain that she loved him. Nothing but love could have prompted her to take what she considered to be the considerable risk of marriage. "You are incorrigible, wife."

  She shrugged. "I'm just not as gullible as you seem to believe."

  He swept her up in his arms and headed toward the bed. "I wasn't teasing you, sweetheart. Many husbands and wives meet in their bedrooms only long enough to ensure children."

  Her lips nuzzled his ear, and she breathed into it when she spoke. "I must warn you now that in this I am not willing to bow to the dictates of Society."

  His entire body reacted to the feel of her hot breath against his ear. What had she said? Oh, yes.

  "You would mind sleeping alone now that we are married?"

  "You promised me I would never be lonely at night."

  He stood her next to the bed and rid her of her nightrail before shedding his dressing gown, the only garment he wore. Her eyes reflected desire as her gaze traveled down his body
, stopping to linger on his rapidly swelling manhood. She shifted her gaze back to his face, and her smile turned wanton.

  He wanted her so much that his body ached for the release he found when they came together, but first he wanted to talk.

  No more teasing. "I'm proud of you."

  She reached out and touched his chest, her fingers burning a path down to his navel. "I know. You're a very special man." She looked up and met his gaze. "My brother is different than I imagined."

  "He was raised by your father, not your mother."

  She nodded. "Yes. I know. I want to get to know him. I think that's what my mother wanted when she made me promise to take her journals to him."

  "You are a woman of uncommon honor, Thea."

  She said nothing, and he hated the feeling that tightened his chest. He was almost sure that she loved him—but did she still feel that she'd ignored her mother's last wish by marrying him? The pain of that thought hit him like a blow.

  She slid her hands up and around his neck, then leaned forward and kissed one of his nipples. He needed her. Now.

  "What's the matter?"

  Her question barely registered as his rising passion overwhelmed him. He shook his head, not wanting to think about anything but the softness of her beautiful naked body so close to his own.

  She wouldn't let it go, though. Twisting her face away to avoid his lips, she demanded he answer her.

  He pressed his forehead to her temple. "I'm glad that you were able to keep at least one promise to your mother."

  She gripped his face in her hands and forced him to meet her eyes.

  Fierce intensity blazed at him. "I kept both promises to my mother. She didn't want me to marry a man like my father, and I didn't."

  "You were afraid to marry me. Afraid I would turn cruel."

  "That was foolish. No two men could be more different. You were right when you said that he allowed his pride to destroy our family. It was his weakness that hurt my mother, not his strength. You are strong, Pierson. So strong that sometimes it scares me. But not because I think you will ever hurt me. Because I fear sometimes I will fail to be the wife a man of your character deserves. You swallowed your pride, pursuing me even when I had rejected you."

  Tears stood out in her eyes.

  He brushed away the moisture from her bottom eyelids with his thumbs. "I had no choice. I love you, Thea. I need you."

  Her head dropped. "You humble me."

  He tilted her chin up and kissed her. Hard. "I love you."

  He waited, almost not breathing, for her response.

  "I love you, too, Pierson. I love your arrogance, though I would have thought that impossible. I love your gentleness, your strength, your stubbornness, your loyalty, your honor, but most of all, I love you for the way you make me feel."

  He brushed one pink nipple with the back of his fingers. "It's a good thing I let you seduce me then."

  She laughed. "I didn't mean what you make my body feel, though that is a most wondrous gift." She laid her hand over her bare breast. "I meant what you make me feel in here. You fill my heart up to overflowing."

  It was his turn to feel humbled. He resolved to be worthy of the great trust she had given him, trust made more difficult to extend because of her background. He would never take her love or her trust for granted.

  With a suddenness that knocked the breath right out of her lungs, Drake yanked Thea to him. She didn't even get out the smallest protest before his lips rocked over hers. Not that she would have protested. She had not been overstating the case when she told him she considered her body's reaction to him a tremendous gift.

  A gift almost as priceless as his love.

  She returned his kiss with unfettered passion, desperate to feel one with him after the emotional upheaval of the last few days. He ran his hands all over her body, but when they slipped between her thighs, her knees turned to water.

  She collapsed against him, pressing her aching breasts against his chest. "Love me, Pierson. Please."

  Lowering their bodies to the bed, he whispered against her lips. "Now and forever, love. Now and forever."

  * * *

  Epilogue

  « ^

  Drake Hall, England 1821

  The baby cried.

  Her son. The beauty of the squirming infant hurt in a way she wanted never to end. She had given birth to life. Wonderful, innocent life.

  She pushed herself up in the huge four-poster bed, ignoring the admonishment of both her maid and the midwife to rest. She had to see her son. Each moment with him was a gift she had never thought to have.

  The heavy door of the master chamber slammed against the wall. Thea's gaze flew to the sight of her husband's towering frame outlined in its opening. His face wore the same worried expression it had so often since he had discovered she was with child. He met her eyes, and in that brief glance she knew nothing would ever be the same. They were a family. Now and forever.

  "I came as quickly as I could. You are so headstrong. Trust you to go into labor two weeks early when I am away on business."

  He strode over to the bed and glared down at her, but his frown did not reach his eyes. Their dark molasses depths were filled with warm approval.

  He did not turn away from her, but spoke to the midwife. "Give me the babe."

  "It is a son. Our son. Are you not thrilled?" Her words came out soft, supremely happy.

  "Thrilled is a paltry word for what I feel." He took the baby from the midwife. "He is beautiful." He looked up from the tiny bundle. "My love, you have given me the greatest gift imaginable."

  Turning his attention back to the child, Drake said, "I will be all that a father should be."

  Her heart filled with the love that grew each day of her marriage to him. "How can you help it? You are all that a man should be in every other respect."

  He turned glassy eyes to her. "How can I thank you, Thea? You have fulfilled every dream that I harbored deep in my heart."

  She smiled through tears that burned a path down her cheek. "It is only fair, my love. You have brought to life dreams that I was afraid to even admit to myself that I had."

  He reached out and pulled her close, their baby between them. Although she was exhausted from the birth, she felt energy surge through her at the connection with both her husband and her newborn son. Mama would be happy. She would approve of Drake, and she would have loved her grandson.

  Thea intended to speak often of Mama to her son. Anna Selwyn would not be forgotten, nor would her legacy of love. She lived on through her daughter, and Thea vowed to be worthy of the sacrifices her mother had made to raise her in the light of love rather than the shadow of suspicion.

  Perhaps Jared would learn to live in the light of love as well. One day he would be willing to read the journals. Until then it was enough that he and the rest of Thea's family chose to be part of her life. But even had they not, she would never complain because she had Pierson Drake.

  A man who made marriage a blessing.

  When she thought of the fears she had harbored about marrying him, she smiled. He had proven to her that he loved her for who she was. She still ran Merewether Shipping, discreetly of course. She gave lectures on the subject of abolition and invited influential members of Parliament to her town house to discuss it and other important issues.

  Drake invariably supported her. Their marriage was not without conflict. She and Drake were both too strong-willed for such a feat, but in the things that really counted, they were as one.

  She leaned forward and kissed the corner of his mouth, while resting her hand on their son's head. He turned and smiled into her eyes. The promises she saw there would last a lifetime. She had no doubt.

  * * * * *

 

 

 
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