Warrior's Moon cotm-5 Read online

  Eadan nodded. “He has a wife but no children. He wanted Mum to be his lemon and give him children. But she wouldn’t let him have us.”

  “Lehman, he wanted to make her his lehman.” Percival would have made Shona, his former stepmother, his mistress with all the responsibilities and none of the privileges of his wife.

  It was monstrous and disgusting, and no more than he expected of an English baron, though he’d never tell Abigail that.

  Fury filled Caelis, but he did his best not to let it bleed through his countenance and scare the children.

  “In my dreams, men turn into wolves sometimes but women never turn into lemons.”

  He didn’t correct his son’s pronunciation, but he did wonder at it.

  “What is a lemon?” Niall asked, however.

  Eadan’s brow furrowed like he was surprised by the question. “It’s a yellow fruit. Sour. Mum read to me about it from a book written by one of the priests in Italy. My lord was ever so fond of the writings of the Church.”

  “I see.” Caelis made no attempt to hide his smile. “Percy isn’t turning your mother into his lemon, or anything else.”

  Eadan nodded in complete agreement. “Mum won’t let him.”

  “Neither will I.”

  “Good. Mum isn’t as big as she thinks she is.”

  Niall laughed. “She seems plenty big to me.”

  “Mama is tiny but strong,” Eadan replied staunchly. “I’ll be taller ’n her soon enough. She always says so.”

  “Aye.” Emotion threatened to choke Caelis.

  This child standing before him with blue eyes the same gentian shade and oval shape as his own was his son. The fruit of sacred passion he had shared with his true mate.

  Because only a true mate could become pregnant by a Chrechte when she was human.

  All his former laird’s arguments against the mating shattered in the face of that truth. Not only had she given birth, but his son’s enhanced ability to smell indicated that he would go through the change into wolf form when he reached age.

  Caelis shuddered to think what would have happened to his son if he had shifted without a pack to protect him. But then, he had a pack.

  An English one.

  He looked to Thomas, who was already teaching a game with sticks to the Sinclair’s twin sons. Their baby daughter slept above stairs this time in the afternoon.

  Caelis carried Marjory to where Thomas and the children played on the floor of the great hall nearby. He set the girl down and she immediately grabbed for her brother’s hand. Eadan took it, as if he was used to doing so and led her to the others.

  Caelis lowered himself to the floor beside Thomas. “Teach me this game,” he demanded.

  The young wolf merely nodded and explained the rules. They’d played for a bit, even getting the wee Marjory to participate, when Caelis asked, “How came you to be such close friends to my mate?”

  “Her father sought us out. I do not know how he knew of our true nature, or that of our mother, but the steward was well aware and wanted us nearby in case Eadan made the transition.”

  “What of your own family?”

  “My father is a minor baron and wanted nothing of us, offspring from his lehman.”

  “Does he know she is Chrechte?”

  Grief twisted Thomas’s youthful features. “No. He never knew and now she is gone.”

  “I am sorry.” Caelis had lost his own parents, only to learn recently it had been at the hands of the very man who had insinuated himself into Caelis’s life as a second father.

  Uven had played mentor and parent to Caelis, all the while guilty of the most heinous betrayals.

  “She loved us, but fate picked poorly in her true mate,” Thomas continued in a quiet voice as he directed the children’s play. “Our father is a hard man with no love in his heart for those he uses so cruelly.”

  “How did she die?”

  “Fever. She was pregnant again, but too old to carry mayhap. Anyway, she and the babe died. That was five years ago. Father took a fee from the Baron of Heronshire for us to come into his household as personal companion and servant to his lady wife.”

  “The ways of the English are beyond my ken,” Caelis said with disgust.

  “It was Shona’s father who instigated the transaction. As I said, he wanted us to be near if his grandson made the change.”

  “Eadan will,” Caelis and Talorc, laird of the Sinclairs, said in unison.

  The others had remained in the great hall, watching the children play, remaining quiet amongst themselves, though Caelis did not doubt Abigail and Talorc had conversed across their mate bond.

  Ciara nodded her agreement. “His wolf is already strong in him.”

  “Shona is still ignorant of the Chrechte’s existence,” Caelis observed.

  “She is.” Thomas didn’t sound happy about that. “There was no pack nearby, but our mother taught us that we could not share our secret unless there was dire need.”

  “Mating constitutes dire need, in case you are wondering,” Abigail said with more sting than she usually spoke, and a look of old censure at her husband.

  “Aye. Though how you could not realize she was your true mate when it is clear you shared in the physical bonds of love…” Talorc let the criticism trail off, but there was no doubting his disapproval.

  “My laird told me she wasn’t and I didn’t believe her when she told me she thought she was pregnant. I asked Uven and he said that it wasn’t possible. That Shona could not be my true mate; as my alpha, he would know if she was. I knew matings between humans and Chrechte were rare, but I had hoped so fervently. I was very angry I had to let her go; I wasn’t thinking clearly at the time.”

  The admission was hard to make.

  Ciara frowned. “Unless he had the gift, an alpha has no more hope of divining one’s mate than any other member of the pack.”

  “I know that. Now.” It would have been a great benefit to have known this truth of their heritage six years ago.

  There were too many things Uven of the MacLeod had kept from his people in his quest to control the clan and the pack so completely.

  “You made one hell of a mistake,” Niall observed without rancor but without pity either.

  “I did.” But Shona would forgive him once she understood.

  His sweet mate’s forgiving nature was every bit as ingrained in her as her stubbornness.

  He turned his attention toward getting to know his children while the woman he and his wolf ached to claim slept upstairs.

  * * *

  Shona woke to the absolute dark of the wee hours on a moonless night.

  It had been so long since she had slept well and deeply, comfortable in a bed she knew would not be disturbed.

  She wasn’t sure why she knew this bed was an absolutely safe one, but she did, in that place in her brain not too influenced by waking. So why the urge to get up?

  The next question her brain always conjured upon waking answered the first.

  The sensation of something not being right pushed her into full wakefulness when her body wanted to settle back into sleep.

  Where were her children? She remembered coming to the guest room in the Sinclair keep for a much-needed nap, but that had to have been hours ago.

  She must have slept through the evening meal, her children’s bedtime and into the night. Though Shona could not be sure of how late it was without seeing the stars position in the sky, how refreshed she felt indicated she’d slept away all of the afternoon and a good deal of the night.

  She reached out to feel around for the edge of the bed and realized two things at once. The first was that she was in the center and the second that Audrey was no longer in the room.

  This concerned her nearly as much as not knowing where her children were. Though Audrey was no fool, at nineteen she had a less jaundiced view of the world than Shona.

  This made her vulnerable to those who might deceive and use her, as Shona had been six y
ears ago.

  With increasingly urgent moves, Shona used her hands to find her way around the room. On a shelf that jutted out from the wall near the head of the bed, fingers encountered a candle and flint for striking. ’Twas an unexpected extravagance, but she quickly made use of it and lit the candle.

  The glow from the single candle dispelled the darkness, though the corners of the room remained in shadow. Shona spied a dark shape that she assumed was clothing Audrey had pulled for her from the small bundle of possessions taken on the flight from Heronshire barony. She grabbed the fabric, only to realize that Audrey had pulled out Shona’s green velvet dress.

  Shaking her head at Audrey’s silliness, Shona donned the garment free of dust and the detritus of travel, unlike the dress she’d arrived in. It took precious time to secure the sleeves, but running about the keep in nothing but her shift was not an option.

  Especially after the last months at the barony, when the most innocent of gestures had been taken as invitations she’d never had any intention of offering.

  She didn’t take the time to brush or pull her hair back. Neither did she search for her shoes.

  Shona needed to find her children and hoped she would not wake the entire keep doing it. But if that was what it took, wake them she would.

  She rushed out the door and nearly tripped over Caelis’s form. He was sitting directly in front of her door, looking around as if trying to figure out where the danger was coming from. His big body rippled with muscle, even in his low position on the floor.

  “What are you doing outside my room?” she demanded in a whisper, wishing she had not noticed anything appealing about his physical appearance.

  He stood with the fluid grace she’d worked hard to forget. “What are you doing rushing around in the wee hours of the morning?” he asked instead of replying.

  “Looking for my children.”

  “They are sleeping in the room beside yours. Your champions are in there as well, guarding the lad’s and lass’s sleep.” Caelis’s disgruntled tone implied he wasn’t as pleased about that as Shona was.

  Her own heart, which had been beating near out of her chest, settled into a more normal rhythm. “Which one?”

  He indicated a door to the right with an incline of his head in that direction.

  She immediately headed toward it, but Caelis’s arm shot out, his hand closing over her wrist. “Where are you going?”

  “To see them.” She spoke slowly as if to a not very bright child.

  “You will wake them.”

  She didn’t intend to, but ’twas not her greatest consideration at the moment. “I will be quiet.”

  “Eadan will hear you.” The certainty in Caelis’s tone implied he somehow already knew about their son’s acute ability to detect sound.

  “Nevertheless, I will see them.”

  “Why? I have told you they are resting with your friends. Do you not trust Thomas and Audrey to watch over the children?”

  “Of course I do, but I only have your word that Eadan and Marjory are behind that door, safe and sleeping peacefully.”

  Caelis’s head snapped back as if she’d slapped him with all the fury she’d wanted to six years ago. Back then, she’d been too much in love to do him harm, despite his betrayal.

  Now, she would not hesitate.

  “You do not trust my word?” he asked with shock too real to be feigned.

  She was hit by her own sense of unreality. “You expect me to?”

  “Aye.”

  “Then you are a bigger fool than I was six years ago.”

  “I have told you there were reasons for what happened between us.” And he sounded like he fully expected her to listen to him list them.

  “What happened was that you made promises that had no more substance than the morning mist.” And no amount of explaining could change that.

  “I meant my words to you when I spoke them.”

  That was supposed to matter to her? She jerked her wrist from his hold. “But not later.”

  He’d broken his vows and she’d ended up married to an old man whose touch had near to driven her insane. If she had not had her children, Shona would not have survived the last years.

  She was sure of it.

  She moved away, intent on finding Eadan and Marjory. He did not try to stop her again.

  She pushed against the door, but it did not give. If Caelis were indeed telling the truth, then Audrey or Thomas must have dropped the bar into place on the other side. She appreciated her friends’ dedication to safety, but Shona would not return to the guest room without confirming her children’s well-being.

  She knocked softly on the door, knowing the siblings slept more lightly than even her son.

  Only a few seconds passed before the door swung inward, revealing Thomas’s sleepy countenance.

  “You wish to see the little ones,” he guessed.

  She nodded.

  Thomas stepped back and Shona moved into the room. The candle she carried casting a soft glow over the space, revealing the bedding on the floor where Thomas had obviously been resting. Beyond that was a bed similar to the one Shona had been sleeping in, but this one was a lot more crowded with Audrey in the middle and Eadan and Marjory on either side of her.

  Audrey’s eyes were open, but she did not move. Obviously not wanting to disturb the children, she sent Shona a small smile of reassurance. Eadan shifted, making a soft noise, but he didn’t wake, proving just how exhausting the past sennights had been for him.

  Shona did not speak, but simply sent a questioning glance to Audrey. The blond woman gave an infinitesimal nod, telling Shona all was well.

  Thomas patted her on the shoulder. “We will waken you in the morning when they rise, if you are still sleeping.”

  He spoke quietly, his mouth very near her ear.

  She nodded, sending them both a grateful smile before going back into the hall. Caelis stood there, glowering at Thomas as Shona pulled the door closed behind her.

  She turned to face the man she was quickly coming to view as her nemesis. “I cannot imagine what you find so objectionable about young Thomas, but he will grow into a fine warrior with great honor one day. You will stop glaring at him so.”

  “He is already a man.”

  “He is but nineteen.” Which admittedly was three years past the generally acknowledged advent into manhood, but Thomas was still so young. Despite his own experiences to the contrary, he saw the world through eyes that believed in man’s goodness and inherent honor.

  “He is almost a child.” Though she knew he would not thank her for saying so.

  “He is too familiar with you.”

  “He is my friend.”

  Caelis appeared unmoved. “So he claimed earlier.”

  Chapter 5

  The Chrechte are stronger than humans but not superior to them. They are brethren as the Faol are brethren to the Paindeal and the Éan.

  —CAHIR TRADITIONS

  The tone of Caelis’s voice implied he was no happier about her friendship with Thomas than he was about the youth’s supposed familiarity with her.

  Shona gave a mental shrug. Caelis’s feelings were of little import to her. “It is true.”

  She considered Audrey and Thomas the siblings her parents had never been blessed to provide her. Shona had never looked on them as servants as her husband and the rest of the household did.

  “Does every male friend you have whisper words into your ears as a lover would do?”

  “You are daft. Thomas is no more lover-like than…than a fish. He and Audrey are my dearest friends.” Shona’s only true friends, if she wanted to be honest about it.

  Shona had allowed none but those two to breach the walls she’d built around her heart after this man’s betrayal and her parents’ rejection because of it. She’d felt the twins’ helplessness in the face of their fates being chosen for them by an uncaring father because it was so like her own.

  Her father had cared, but
he’d been equally certain he knew what was best, and forcing her into marriage with the baron had been at the top of that list.

  “I owe them both a debt of honor for watching over you and the children.”

  He’d said something like that before. It made no more sense to her now than it had earlier.

  But she would make no attempt to disabuse him of the notion. If he felt some obligation to Audrey and Thomas, perhaps he would be more apt to help them find safety, if not Shona herself.

  “I am going back to bed.” She turned to retrace her steps to her room.

  “You are still tired?” he asked, keeping pace with her.

  “No.” In fact, she was not, but she wasn’t about to wander the passageways of the sleeping keep, either.

  “Then perhaps we can talk?” Caelis asked, sounding less demanding than she’d ever heard him.

  Shona stopped at her door, looking up at the only male visage that had ever stirred desire in her.

  Even now, after everything, her need for him was a low rumble in her belly. She’d been sure that part of her was dead, but one day in his company and she knew it was not. She wanted him as much as she ever had, but she would not have him.

  Forcing the visceral need aside, she asked with no small amount of unbelief, “You wish to discuss the issues between us now, in the wee hours?”

  “Aye.”

  “’Tis hardly appropriate behavior.” She shook her head. Not to deny him, but in wonder at his audacity.

  “I do not concern myself with what is proper.”

  “You never did.” But she’d thought he had the honor to make improper behavior right.

  He had not.

  “There was a time when you would have laughed at this English sense of propriety you seek to hide behind now.”

  “I learned why proper behavior has its place.” As protection from what had happened to her, for one thing.

  “Please, Shona. Hear me out.”

  Honestly? She felt no inclination to do so, but she needed information on what Caelis planned to do now that he’d discovered he had a son. If he’d denied Eadan, all would be so simple. She would have gone to Balmoral Island as planned and thrown herself on the mercy of family relations—however tenuous.